2022.01.19 01:02 burglicious3 How is Polonia? I took a look around there and it seems like it has a nice housing stock for a first time buyer. What’s everyone’s thoughts?
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2022.01.19 01:02 IAmTheMagicMoose Pact Failed Successfully
2022.01.19 01:02 Soda_pressedbitch Mother didn’t care if I lived
I’ve never posted on here before and I hope this is okay to post on this thread. I just feel like I need to get it out but don’t feel like I can talk to anyone around me because they just don’t seem to get it. I have depression and I’ve been really bad lately which was mostly triggered due to interactions with my mother, I’ve gone no contact and feel so guilty about it but I don’t see any other way for me to be okay. My mother was emotionally abusive, she’s a narcissist, my dads also a victim of abuse but enables her, it’s taken me a long time to realise my childhood wasn’t normal. That the things I experienced as a child drive a lot of my actions now. And I’m in therapy at the moment trying to challenge the taught behaviours and responses, we’re working through things slowly and I know theres no one answer I can easily get but I just don’t see how anything will change or be better in the future.
Essentially my biggest hold up at the moment is something my mum did, or I guess didn’t do. And I don’t know how to get past it or if I can get past it. I guess I’d blocked it out or not dealt with it previously because I had moved out and had distractions. But then the pandemic hit and I had to move back in with my parents, after around 6 years of being away from them my mother hadn’t changed and I basically hid in my room for half a year, scared to come out. And now all these feelings are back on the surface and I have no idea how to cope with them.
Bit of a TW because I will be mentioning self harm and a suicide attempt. When I was maybe 16/17 my mother and I fought a lot, I tried to avoid it but sometimes it was inevitable no matter what I did. Every time it happened my mother would push me to my breaking point and my dad would get involved however she would lie and manipulate him and it would end up with me alone in my room and him comforting her. I would always hear her crying and lying about me and it sucked, I ended up turning to self harm and they never knew about it. On one occasion I cut myself too deep and bled for hours and all I wanted was for someone to come in and find out so they could help me but it didn’t happen and I ended up having to get help from a school nurse and going to get stitches the next day. When they did find out, I think 6 months to a year later my mother said it was for attention. And while things like this hurt, I feel like I can cope with them and would be willing to move past it.
What I’m struggling to cope with was when I first attempted suicide. I won’t go into too many details but I had two bottles of medication, suicide notes and a bath for good measure. I wrote my notes in the bathroom, sat on the floor next to the full tub and the medication and this is the point in which my mother walked in, looked at me and walked back out again before going back to her bedroom. She did nothing about it, she went to sleep. My dad found me because a friend had gotten into contact with him because they hadn’t heard from me. When he pulled me out he didn’t take me to the hospital and I had to beg him to take me to a relatives house because I couldn’t cope with being there. These things he didn’t want to do because it would “upset” my mother. That night I was so ill, I remember how much pain I was in and being alone in my sisters spare room, I found out recently she didn’t know the full details so I don’t blame her for it. But I can’t get past my parents’ actions… they didn’t care about me. She didn’t care if I died, he didn’t care if I was okay. And I just don’t know how to process that and get past it, I don’t even know what to think about it because I just don’t understand how they could do nothing. And I know there are people out there with much worse abuse stories and I have so much admiration for them because I have this one thing that bothers me so much and I don’t know what to do about it.
And so that’s what’s on my mind at the moment, what’s keeping me up at night and triggering my low periods. I just can’t get over the feeling of being so unloveable or worthless or whatever it was that made my parents not care if I were to live or not. My sister tried to say that they just didn’t know how to deal with it and I could maybe understand that explanation for my dad but my mum just left me to it? She didn’t make any attempt to stop me and I just can’t understand it.
If you’ve gotten this far, thanks for sticking with it. I don’t know if anyone on here will have similar stories or any advice but if you do I’d appreciate it or even thoughts on what to do about the relationship with my parents. I have a big family and I’m struggling with the no contact because it just makes everything so awkward.
TLDR: My mother didn’t try to stop me killing myself and my dad didn’t want to help me after. Not sure what to think about it/how to move past it.
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2022.01.19 01:02 ProgrammerLow9027 This is my first ever Reddit post and I wanna make it My best Does anyone wanna jerk with Dm me on insta @_goated_mixes_
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2022.01.19 01:02 LooseTicket2692 Microsoft to acquire Activision in 67billion dollar deal
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2022.01.19 01:02 Traditional_Assist96 where do I start to achieve my dreams?
I want to get out there, achieve my dreams, be “that” person that worked so hard, but it payed off. But I have no idea where to start? Any advice?
submitted by Traditional_Assist96 to self [link] [comments]
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2022.01.19 01:02 Kan-Khajoora Rare footage of Her Majesty, fluttershy_qtest, purging the last Chaddi from r/India by royal decree - Circa 2014
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2022.01.19 01:02 greentruthLulu ‘Nocebo effect’: two-thirds of Covid jab reactions not caused by vaccine, study suggests
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2022.01.19 01:02 Apprehensive-Cash-57 GOG Launcher predicts Gta 6
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2022.01.19 01:02 SamskiHoso Fiancee and I fight over small things all the time... should I still get married? Do you regret getting Married?
this is a throwaway for obvious reasons...
I'm American and she is from Korea. We've been together for 3 years now. First 2 years were great, we didnt live together and both worked so would see each other when we could. We would go out do dinner, shows, and do fun couply things in general....
Once covid started, we moved in together and ever since, we've been fighting. We fight at least once a week, if not more. The things we fight about can range from something so miniscule where we're even questioning ourselves "why are we fighting"... to more serious issues. We usually make up in a day but... after almost a year of this happening, i'm, seriously questioning if she's the person I want to spend the rest of my life with. If we get married and have kids, if we add more stress to our lives... will we fight even more than we do now?
We are both very stubborn. Our communication has improved A LOT since the beginning but there is still a language barrier. I don't know Korean so she has to communicate with me in English and I completely understand that it is very hard for her to communicate, especially argue, in a language thats not native to hers... but i'm just tired now and at the point of thinking about if the fighting will ever truly end.
I feel like i'm just ranting but if anyone has every been through a similar situation, any advice would be greatly appreciated.
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2022.01.19 01:02 mynutsaremusical When in pain, would we say "ow" if we had never heard anyone say it before?
2022.01.19 01:02 quickdrawguffaw Super glue removal from a Mcfarlane figure.
So I had to do a bit of a modification on a Mcfarlane Batman figure. The bat symbol (separate inlay piece attached to the chest) was crooked out of the box, and I had to remove it and glue it back on. I thought I used little enough glue to avoid it oozing out into the chest, but I was wrong.
Does anyone here know a good method for removing the excess glue on the surface of the figure? Any help appreciated!
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2022.01.19 01:02 Skankara98 My Wolf of Wall Street steelbook just came in. One of my favorite movies and I love the art
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2022.01.19 01:02 Damo957271 Girlfriend of 5 years has broken up with me and I’m so lost
As the title says, my girlfriend has decided that she no longer what’s to be in a relationship. But I love her so much, and I can’t let her go. I’ve tried everything I can to see what I can do to better our relationship, but she still says she doesn’t want to be with me. I struggle to communicate as I’m very shy but I really need some advice about what to do. I feel like my whole world has been shattered
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2022.01.19 01:02 JLmussi Ultimate Beginner's Guide to Creating 3D Stylized Environments EP #2
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2022.01.19 01:02 NewImportance24 How to host a really good philanthropy event?
I'm on my chapter's philanthropy committee and we are planning an event to take place around March. I'm really worried about how this will play out because our last event was not good at all. We barely got any participation from other chapters so this time I really want to increase participation and make it fun! Do yall have any tips!!
submitted by NewImportance24 to Sororities [link] [comments]
2022.01.19 01:02 Secret-Ease-1709 Asking for a raise?
2022.01.19 01:02 Accurate-Bluebird-43 I have 2021 water talismans which in total is valued at 1,442,994. I am willing to trade them for just 1.3M
2022.01.19 01:02 goamanhara Employees being loyal to a company, the company
|submitted by goamanhara to antiwork [link] [comments]|
2022.01.19 01:02 g522121 My gf said that i need to be more affectionate....
2022.01.19 01:02 EnvironmentalFix8074 Check out my sausage, nopales, mushroom, anchovie, sun dried tomato, pesto pizza
|submitted by EnvironmentalFix8074 to Pizza [link] [comments]|
2022.01.19 01:02 anxious_maximus123 Can my employer force me to return to work after 5 days if I'm still having covid symptoms?
I tested positive for Covid 5 days ago, but I'm still having symptoms and not feeling well. My employer is telling me I need to return to work tomorrow.
But if I'm not mistaken, CDC guidelines state that isolation after a positive test should be at LEAST 5 days, and then isolation can end IF symptoms have improved.
submitted by anxious_maximus123 to AskNYC [link] [comments]